RESILIENCE

Savitri Pema

 




Tapes of magnetic recordings, 
daily infections and mortality warnings
unspool inside my head, twisting, turning,
stealing sleep and peace of mind.

 

I stare at the marble faced moon, 
pouring molten mercury on bony
branches: semi-naked with mottled leaves,
swollen jutting joints like cancerous growth

 

Nocturnal creatures in dense
undergrowth burrowing, scampering.
No match for revolving searchlights
of owls, ruthlessly swooping, impaling.

 

In translucent pools I unwillingly
witness the surgical removal of flesh 
from quivering heart, spinal bone
and stringy sinew, as if my own

 

Scudding clouds play hide and seek,
blotting out the ghostly sight.
Be safe be positive, a mocking refrain
Fear like talons fasten into my brain.

 

My grief too deep for tears, I tumble
down bottomless craters, into endless
tunnels. Yet callous Earth remains
blinded, and the lunar cycle unimpeded

 

Streaks of amber stroke my brow,
as  the deity of dawn drives his chariot
across the heavens, opening passages
into forgotten meadows of hope.
I remind myself to rewind, to
remember when not all was fractured
Under my furrowed layers of skin
are hidden seams of strength.

 Resilience regained.

                                   **************************

‘Resilience is about recovering  from despair and helplessness: from those times when we feel unable to see any light in our lives.

 

Of course it is vital that we should reach out for expertise whenever needed. However self efficacy 1 also plays an important role, as every experience teaches us something about ourselves. If we use these experiences to discover what worked for us, we can start building our own ways for coping with adversity in the future.

 

I often found in my practice as a psychologist that reminding an individual of  their own strategies – however small, generally resulted  in boosting their self confidence. Asking them to recall  when and how they had overcome obstacles in their life brought about a more optimistic self-belief in their own competency, of being successful in dealing with whatever they were struggling with.

 

Those with a high level of self efficacyie the belief in their own ability to solve a problem; to control their own behaviour; and regulate their emotions, are more likely to be able to bounce back quicker, and to recover.

 

This is at the heart of resilience: we need to remind ourselves  when, how and what we did, to make the downward spiral less debilitating.

 

References:

 

1: Albert Bandura (1977; 2003)

 

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